875574:

 I just rediscovered this journal.  As mediocre as it may sound, I am glad I have documented some of my past thoughts and doings, even if it is to a non-existing audience. Gives me something to reflect back on and also helps clear the mind of haunting, recurring thoughts.  I usually try not to make the posts too personal, incase there are people who lurk around here and read once in a while. A person's writings usually become uninteresting and boring when it gets too personal and detailed. That's what I feel I am doing right now.
Though, that makes me think.... am I writing this journal for an audience or for myself? Oh well.

Im in a state of euphoria. I don't know why.

Pretending to be asleep until everyone leaves for their daily routine.  I don't want to be questioned as to why I am still up. I don't feel like making up an explanation. 

I don't know what to type about, but I'm in a very conversational mood. For some reason I keep analyzing myself. Lots of thinking and thoughts right now, probably why I can't sleep, thus resulting in why I am writing. Usually when I think this much, my mental/emotional status greatly declines, but for some reason it's different this time. Not sure why, but it's fine with me. I like having time to think to myself though.  I enjoy being alone a lot of the time. Lets me just reflect and ponder on things. It's like catching up with an old friend, but inside my head. That doesn't mean I don't like being around other people though! 
I wish I was better at putting my thoughts into words. Sometimes I don't even know what I feel though. Sorry for the vagueness, I just wish there was a way to easily come to a realization, of which I don't even know what of. There just seems to be some sort of empty kind of space going on. This is weird and slightly complicated trying to explain this... it probably is reading out to be totally different than what I want it to be. Oh well. I give up... 
Looks like this journal entry was meant for me. You poor reader  ; )